eustilly's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Crushes crush. I cannot believe my rotten luck so far today. It actually began yesterday at lunch. No...let's go back a bit further. Art and I have just called it quits in the romantic department, and I needed some mini-crushes to pursue to keep my mind entertained. I believe you recall this from my 5/10 entry: "The great thing about mini-crushes is that they exist for one purpose and one purpose alone-- occupy my thoughts." I also said I don't want to date any of these boys, but that's horse shit. I wouldn't say no! One of those mini-crushes is the Chef. (He probably won't be mentioned after today, so why give his real name?) He works at this market/cafe that Heather and I frequent for lunch. The Chef is such a cutie, and every time I looked at his hand, there was no sign of a wedding ring. Woohoo! We eventually worked up to first names, hometowns, and vague interests, as well as the usual "how was your weekend?" Things have been going well. Yesterday, I made up my mind to ask him out. I am not even sure I want to date anyone right now, but I felt like this was the best time to go for it. So we went to his cafe. He wasn't there. Bummer. And I was looking so cute, too! Let's hope I get the nerve to do that again. Back to this morning. I purposely wore jeans and a plain white t-shirt, with my mom's dog tags. I wasn't trying to make a militant statement, but I sure did feel casual and carefree. ("...friendly, smiley girl...") I figured he had seen me looking great before, and he's male-- he knows I have nice legs by now. Heather and I went to the cafe and things were going great. He talked with me, shook my hand, and winked at me a lot. He even gave us our coffee for free! I mean, I thought he'd beat me to the asking for a minute there. So, as Heather and I sit waiting for my grilled cheese, she exclaims, "Oh my God!" At first I actually thought, "Ooh, is he putting roses in my to go box or something?" Then he finishes her exclamation with, "He's married!" My head whipped around to where she was looking, and sure enough, there were his beautiful hands, preparing my sandwich, with a big fat gold band on his left ring finger. This is the point where my blood boils. That sonofabitch. I was about to ask him on a date and he is married. Why the crap is he flirting like mad with me then? Before anyone offers any lame explanations, let me clarify a few things: Not that my heart is broken or anything, but in a way, it is! I had a good prospect with a nice job, a nice car, and a great demeanor. And he's married. To quote Mr. Baker in Sixteen Candles: "That's why they call them crushes. If they were easy, they'd call them something else." 9:05 am - 06.04.04 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
||||||